I dont know, im really confused right now, i just got off the phone with my best friend and shes so creeped out by me right now It isnt that bad. Yes most guys at 20 have one thing on their mind but that doesnt always mean its the only reason he is dating you. Just let him know where you stand with sex and if he doesnt understand and respect that then he isnt the guy for you. Not every 20 year old is a sexaholic. No, it's not that bad.
It isnt that bad. Yes most guys at 20 have one thing on their mind but that doesnt always mean its the only reason he is dating you.
Just let him know where you stand with sex and if he doesnt understand and respect that then he isnt the guy for you. Not every 20 year old is a sexaholic.
Consider, 20 dating 16 reddit phrase know one
No, it's not that bad. They're all just saying he only wants sex because of the age gap. If you really feel the both of you are ready to start dating, go ahead! My husband and I are 5 years apart and I'm the younger one. We started dating when I was 15 and he was We're still together today and we have a 7-year-old daughter together I was 30 when I got pregnant.
I'm not saying you two should have sex or have a baby. I'm saying there's nothing wrong with you two dating. There's 28 year olds dating 45 years olds, so what's wrong with a year-old dating a year-old?
There is nothing wrong with a 16 year old dating a 21 year old, this guy was just fucked up. But when the older person is 20? It's not about the age differences, it's about the specific ages of the people involved. Ages don't scale linearly. View entire discussion ( comments) help App coins premium gifts. Stay away. Having said all of that No, it's not against the law for a 20 year old to "DATE" a 16 year old. The definition of 'date' means to go out together to a movie or to dinner or dance. It does not mean having sex regular or oral. A guy above the age of 20 dating a 16 year old girl is incredibly weird. This works both ways and goes for women as well before anyone comes for me What could a guy above 20 POSSIBLY see in a 16 .
Nothing, in my opinion. I think you'll be able to tell if all he wants is sex. By the way, I wonder if it was the other way around you were 20 and he was 16would people say all he wanted was sex? That's a really tough situation I have a friend who started dating a 19 year old when she was 15 and they've been together for 7 years now However, there is a good chance he will want to move the relationship along faster than you will.
Legally, your best friend is not of age to consent to a relationship with a 20 year old, sexual or not. Legally, that 20 year old can be charged and convicted of corrupting a minor, molesting a child, and statutory rape if they've ever had sex. Th. 4 years is somewhat a big difference when someone is under 20, I knew a guy who was dating a girl who was 16 and he was 22, when he wanted to break the relationship she black mailed him by saying she would say he raped her, no matter how 'mature' you think a 16 year old is, definitely not worth the hassle. May 13, There's 28 year olds dating 45 years olds, so what's wrong with a year-old dating a year-old? Nothing, in my opinion. I think you'll be able to tell if all he wants is sex. By the way, I wonder if it was the other way around (you were 20 and he was 16), would people say all he wanted was sex? 0 1 0. Login to reply the answers Post; MK.
It really depends on the guy but it is a little weird for a 20 year old to be interested in a 16 year old unless they want something sex and think they will get it from a younger girl. Also, sometimes guys date younger girls becasue they can't get a girlfriend their own age This guy might genuinely like you and be a nice guy, but be careful and make sure you don't do anything you don't want to do and don't be pressured into anything I can understand why your family and friends are nervous about this.
Just make sure you think carefully and do what is right for you. Hwy dont listen the people who tell that it is bad.
She's very mature graduated early from high school and going to be starting collage in fall ' It's more the number then anything else that gets me. My friends who are closer to the situation, as well as my mother are all in favor of me asking her out, but I wanted some unbiased opinions.
There's a reason such girls are known as "jailbait". You're taking major chances even if you don't end up in bed together. You ask for opinions, so here's mine: Treat this babe like kryptonite. Handle only with lead-lined gloves, and stay the hell away from her. Den Beste at AM on December 26, I wanted some unbiased opinions My opinion is that your plan is a bad idea and you should not ask her out nor try to date her in any way until she turns You may be blinding yourself to this because you're close to the situation, but this is socially taboo in the extreme.
Many people will think less of you and her if you persue this. They probably already do. Her dad being a cop just makes the situation all the more absurd. Stay friends until she's If her parents are ok with it, and your parents and friends already are, then that's everyone that matters. You'll get crap from other people if the age discrepancy is apparent, but from the sound of it, it isn't.
Take her up on some of those invitations to dinner, so you meet the parents. Make a good impression. I was dating a 17 year old at 21, everyone throught it was great, no-one outside of the few of us even realised there was an age difference.
Just back away as nicely as you can. Forget the taboo factor, her daddy's a cop. You could be as gentlemanly as is humanly possible, and he could still ruin your life.
20 dating 16 reddit
Any daddy can claim a false statutory rape, but a cop is going to have a better chance of making it stick. That would give you a criminal record featuring sex with a minor. Furthermore, there's a slim chance you'd wind up on the Sex Offender Registry.
Be kind to her, of course - she may be a "very mature" 16, but she's still None of the logic behind this may matter to her. If this is love, true and deep, waiting a few years is nothing.
Consider it a test of the heart. That way, once she's 18, you'll be much more free to do as you please. Also, not advice, just random thoughts - after her parents have met you, what about telling her you'd like to ask her out, but feel a bit odd about the age difference, ask her what she thinks. See what she says.
Once she knows your interested, assuming she wants it to happen, then she might be your best ally in presenting it to her parents. Perhaps "dad, I'd like to date this friend of mine" might work better than "Mr XYZ, I'd like to date your underage daughter".
I don't know, just throwing something out. I see no problem with it, particularly if she's mature for her age But I think it depends though on the state though in terms of a sexual relationship do your homework if you become romantically involved posted by DudeAsInCool at AM on December 26, Also, waiting until she's in collage might be a good idea - it's not long, and a lot of highschool taboo doesn't apply anymore. Reading Jilder's comment - yeah - make sure you're comfortable with the parents as well as they you.
Think "what could happen if I break her heart". Socially, you're much better off waiting until she's started college. Right now you'd be a twenty one year old guy dating a girl in high school - doesn't matter how you dress that up, it still comes out looking really really bad.
It's a shame that arbitrary laws criminalize what could be otherwise fulfilling relations between two people.
C'est la vie in your particular jurisdiction. As others have said, you could pursue a friendship and bide your time before getting romantically involved, but be prepared for some tests of character.
Consider, that 20 dating 16 reddit well
Well age of consent is a very arbitrary concept. Why are teens in Arizona assumed to be less mature than teens in Ohio? It doesn't make any sense.
Besides, social conventions and practices are not necessarily tied to the legal age of consent. Relationships with such age differences happen all the time, it depends on the individuals.
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But, you're thinking of asking permission of the parents, and you're thinking of avoiding sex - that's two complications you don't need at If she already has such a crush on you, how are you going to deal with dating without getting sexual? What if she wants to? You're going to be leading her on that way.
You can't date her and then suddenly turn all "oh no no you're only 16" when sex comes up, and oh it will come up, don't delude yourself.
If you're going to treat her like a child then do it from the start and just don't start anything. A relationship has to be on equal terms at any age. Legally, it's shaky enough that I'd stay away from the situation.
Socially-when I was in high school, there were year-olds dating men ten years their senior legally over the age of consent in that state.
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I've seen the same thing now and then since, especially when I've been in work environments with a lot of younger folk. In general, other teenagers think it's cool that you're so openminded, that she could impress an older guy, and are cool with the idea in general.
Most adults think it's creepy, and no amount of justification or rationalization can change their minds, even if upon meeting the sixteen-year-old the adult in question would guess her to be much older. Whether it's "acceptable" depends on your community, but for dating a teenager not to hurt you at all socially, you'd have to hang out in either a very open-minded social group, or a very young one. Dude, her dad is a cop.
Seriously, I would not touch this with the proverbial ten-foot pole. Really, they are! Right over there, other side of the tall grass, in front of the mall! Quite apart from the age thing, I'd be wary of a relationship with someone who worked for a family member too. Maybe you don't plan on having sex.
There's a chance you actually won't do that. You know who cares? Not her dad.
Jun 02, No. Despite there being only a 4 year age difference, the difference in maturity and mental development is more like decades. A 16 year old is not independent, they are still unsure about their identity, their place in the world, their values and.
Not the judge. Not your neighbors in twenty years when they find out they live next to a sex offender. You can't prove you didn't have sex. Maybe she can't prove you did, but recent high-profile cases indicate she probably won't have to. IMHO, that and the sex offender registry for "crimes" like this is a complete bullshit way of operating a justice system - but, such is the system as it stands. Know that going in. If you lived in another state, where the age was 16, my advice might be different.
I think a 20 year old and 16 year old dating is far less worse than a 20 year old and 45 year old dating. And because I will immediately be labeled as a pedophile let me say that I don't approve of either, but I simply find one to be a lesser evil than the other. I'll turn 20 three months before she turns 17, and even though that's just three months apart, being a 20 year old dating a 16 year old still makes me feel weird. I certainly don't feel 20, and one year ago I was still in high school, but I can't argue with the numbers, and the numbers say that I'm a creep. Dec 25, True Story: A friend of mine dated a girl that was under 18 in Phoenix, AZ. He was probably 19 or This was a few years back, so I don't remember exact age. But, he got consent from the parents and started dating this chick. A month down the road, he pissed the girl off, which in turn pissed off the parents and they took it to the cops.
But in today's legal climate, the advice to stay far away could not be made strongly enough. I'll be honest I came here wanting people to tell me it was okay, I wasn't totally crazy to ask this chick out, because even though I had made up my mind, it was still bugging the hell out of me which should have been all I needed to know it was wrong. And I got that, some of you are saying do it, but even with the support it still just doesn't seem right for some reason.
I like to think of myself as having a more logical thought process then an average person so this whole thing has been driving me bonkers trying to figure out.
You all make very good, and valid points, but I think pleeker and twistofrhyme bring it home, I know I could keep from bringing sex up, but if she wanted it I don't know if I could stop it, and therein is the biggest rub I guess. My biggest concern is and should be her, I don't want to hurt her or make her fear relationships at such an important time in her life for relationships. As such I think I should just steer clear.
I think you've made the right choice.
16 year olds dating 21 year olds *RANT*
It's a teenage girl thing. They don't want to be kids anymore, they want to be seen as mature by their friends and family. She probably looks like an adult, and acts like an adult, but upstairs, she's still a kid. And her dad's a cop. Like someone said, there's a reason they're called Jailbait. Echoing what others have said, it doesn't matter how "mature" she is, a 16 year old is in a totally different place, mentally and physically than a 21 year old.
To be frank, you might want to consider where you are psychologically that are you are even interested in this girl.
Arizona sex offenders are routinely placed on lifetime probation, and have a lot of restrictions and invasions in their lives as long as they remain on it. Just fyi. Jim at AM on December 26, You should be wary of any year-old girl lavishing you with attention.
It's not just possible, but probable, that it's not really you she likes, but the simple fact that a year-old man is paying even the smallest bit of attention to her. Teenagers get very bored very easily. These relationships rarely work in the long run. There are exceptions, of course, but in my opinion, even if you're totally in love with her, this is a very, very bad idea.
I feel like I had plenty of self-confidence and positive sexual awareness at that age, but I remember being attracted to other people in their mid-teens rather than older people. I can't begin to read her mind any more than the rest of the people in this thread canbut just from what you're saying, it sounds like she's not even necessarily expressing sexual interest in you.
Beyond your own attraction to her, you're also being forced to think of this in sexual or potentially-sexual terms by a few other factors the laws, the fact that her dad's a cop. I think the best thing you could do is stay her friend and give her your support and advice as she navigates the landscape of relationships and sex in college. I think it's really sad that some people in this thread are saying you can't be her platonic friend and should drop all interaction with her. But I do think you need to consider your relationship carefully and communicate with her VERY clearly from now on.
First you're going to have to listen to my lecture You need to let this young person grow up. Stay away from her. You are either in college or working at a job. If you really care for this person, let her enjoy where she is. Let her have fun with her high school friends.
Let her go to the prom with somebody that her friends know And most importantly of all If she has a kid It's going to be a disaster! Stay away. Having said all of that