While some typologists avoid addressing sex and gender differences, having engaged with both male and female INTPs and INFJs, I feel that sex differences do play a noteworthy role in their presentation and cannot be ignored, especially when it comes to relationships. When it comes to compatibility, male INTPs probably have the fewest options of all the Myers-Briggs personality types. The real problem for INTPs is finding a partner who can hold their interest for the long haul. This is why INTPs are particularly prone to relational issues associated with narcissism. In order to find satisfaction in a long-term relationship, INTPs desire a partner who is interesting in regularly joining them in intellectual or philosophical dialogue. Without this key ingredient, INTPs may struggle to find reasons to value or want to spend time with their partners.
They usually have a good sense of humor and appreciate this in a partner as well. The most important qualities in a relationship for ISTPs are trust, good communication, and mutual respect.
Try not to complain too much. These individuals are compassionate, down-to-earth, and fun-loving and they look forward to lots of exciting new experiences with their partners. If you share very few of the same values this can be a major roadblock further down the road. ISFPs want a partner who will really listen well; so make sure to put your phone away on the date and give them your full attention! Try to make your dates fun and, if possible, include some beautiful sights and sounds.
They tend to enjoy recreation, quiet walks, concerts, wine tastings, or anything that can engage their senses in a positive, but not overbearing way. Give them time to feel comfortable.
These individuals are good-humored, exciting, and open-minded most of the time. They live to make the most of today and strive to take advantage of every moment and opportunity.
They want a partner who has a good sense of fun, who likes to try new things, and who is willing to take the relationship one day at a time. Trust, good communication, intimacy, and fidelity are all the most important cts to ESTPs in a relationship.
ESFPs hate phoniness! They live to make the most of the moment and enjoy all the beauty and experience that life has to offer.
They enjoy being spontaneous, trying new things, and physically interacting with the outside world. They often enjoy adventurous dates that involve recreation, music, games, or exciting entertainment or cuisine! They also enjoy honest, open communication about their hopes and dreams and shared values.
Meeting INFJs (INTP)
One thing to avoid is pressuring an ESFP for a major commitment or a decision. They like to take their time and be sure before making a commitment and can be slower to come to a decision than other types.
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They will feel flustered and irritated if they are constantly pressured to make decisions or nail down commitments. Try to involve them in decisions as much as possible.
Sep 04, The broken, impressionable infj and the broken, co dependent intp. Yes, it's common. Most of the time either the infj dumps the intp for the flashy, charming enfp or the intp feels like they need to take care of the infj and make their exit stealthily and slowly. Both the INFJ and the INTP dislike dealing with routine, day-to-day tasks, but the INTP is more content to live with a little messiness while the INFJ is much less comfortable doing so. As a result, the INFJ can wind up resenting their INTP partner who leaves more of the mundane, routine activities by the wayside, inadvertently causing the INFJ.
These individuals need more space than many, but they love to get into in-depth, intellectual conversations with their partners and explore new avenues of thought. They love discussing creative connections, the future, science, technology, and progress. A good conversation or reading a good book together is often their idea of an exciting date. That said, they also have an adventurous streak that tends to show its face at random times. They may go from being wrapped up in studies and books for days to suddenly wanting to go deep-sea diving or parasailing.
If you have a sense of adventure or an interest in recreation be sure to bring your ideas up to an INTJ. They enjoy the occasional opportunity to go out and experience nature and adventure.
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They are very independent, reserved people initially and need to have a lot of trust built up before they open up about their feelings. Try to notice the way they treat you as evidence of their feelings. Mutual support, being listened to, intellectual stimulation, and fidelity are all important cts to INTJs in relationships.
These individuals are fascinated by the theoretical and the future, and enjoy dates that are filled with this form of conversation. INFJs exude a lot of warmth, but they also tend to need a lot of alone time.
This can be confusing to partners who see them as more extroverted than they really are. INFJs can go from being very open and warm to disappearing entirely for days to get alone time. INFJs are very single-minded about their goals and they enjoy having a partner who enjoys strategizing and encouraging them and who they can also encourage.
They appreciate honesty and empathy a lot and are attracted to people who treat everyone with kindness. When dating they enjoy deep conversations, and they also enjoy being in nature or doing creative activities together.
INFJs detest conflict and non-constructive criticism. Want a comprehensive guide to the INFJ personality type?
By Elaine Schallock, INFJ. An INFJ sighting in the wild is rare enough; therefore, an INFJ-INFJ pairing would seem tantamount to myth - about as likely as catching a glimpse of a unicorn or a UFO or any other fictional "U"-named objects of folklore. Okay, okay, I exaggerate. Although I personally have never born witness to the fabled INFJ-INFJ pairing, it is, of course, a possibility. INFJ - INTP Relationship Joys and Struggles. This section INFJ - INTP relationship is about how these two personality types come together in a ojasjobz.comically, we will be looking at the joys of this relationship as well as the struggles this relationship may have. INFJ Dating Do's and Don'ts. If you're dating an INFJ, you'll want to make sure you bring a lot of sincerity, curiosity, and empathy to the table. These individuals are fascinated by the theoretical and the future, and enjoy dates that are filled with this form of conversation. INTP Dating Do's and Don'ts. When dating an INTP it.
They are usually confident, ambitious, determined, and decisive. Be on time, keep your promises, and show you take the relationship seriously.
ENTJs enjoy dates that are full of intellectual conversation and discussion. They are attracted to people who have their own independent goals and are also interested in learning and growing each day. They have very little interest in these matters and can find them to be a major turn off.
Fidelity, mutual support, shared values, and intellectual stimulation are the most important cts in a relationship to ENTJs. Try not to beat around the bush. These friendly, enthusiastic individuals enjoy theorizing about the future, sharing their thoughts and feelings, and participating in the arts, music, or anything creative.
We should have been best friends for life. This was us. I would be the INFJ.
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Unfortunately, after some emotional affairs she has left me. Our counselors and my request that she become transparent with her internet passwords to rebuild the trust was against her extreme need for walls and privacy.
This loss is too much to bare. I miss her. This is really interesting! We are both INTPs are really very aloof and detached but do show their affection via acts of kindness and other indirect ways. This is fine, but sometimes especially at the start of a relationshippeople need vocal affirmations or some soul connection during sex.
I would hesitate to date another INTP. Used to being perceived as misfits, with each other they can curl up in the solace of their quiet, introverted world. Reading this article was like looking into a mirror or reading a story about our marriage.
I felt so vindicated when my emotional needs were described so well by another person. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. By Susan Storm. What Do You Think?
I am an INFJ female dating an INTP male (as I just had him take the Myers-Brigg test last night). I can completely relate to everything that you said in your post above. We seem to be inseparable, but I always feel like the end to us is coming because of misunderstandings. Feb 09, INTPs often tend to fall for INFJs, particularly in a heterosexual relationship where the male is INTP and the female is INFJ. Since I am in this one, I can give my theory on why these types fall for each other: Why INFJs Fall for INTPs: 1. INTPs are honest. In fact, they may be the most. Jun 14, INFJ and INTP tend to be writers. Strong writers do well to date and be with writers who can comprehend them and also help them to be stronger writers. INFJ and INTP have a lot on their minds, and one of the hardest parts of dating for these two as individuals is .
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Email Address. The following two tabs change content below. Bio Latest Posts. Susan Storm Founder at Psychology Junkie. She is the mom of five beautiful children and loves using her knowledge of personality type to understand them and others better!
Follow her on Facebook, Twitter, or Pinterest to learn more about type! They may fail to consistently enact their own theories or advice. In other words, if one or both of the INFJ partners is looking to the other to complete the Se piece of the equation that they lack, the relationship can and likely will fail.
This is where learning to let go of S outcomes, along with showing grace is extremely important. Both INFJs must understand that they share the same strengths, but along with that comes the same weaknesses. They cannot expect their partner to pick up where they fail. This may cover everything from finances and budgeting to other pragmatic concerns like remembering to have the car serviced or bills paid on time.
INFJs already intuitively know that, generally speaking, the world undervalues their special brand of know-how.
And they often feel undervalued, having to fight hard to get their piece of the proverbial pie and do it authentically. This is hard enough on its own, but can be particularly demoralizing if an INFJ gets the sense that someone out there in this case, the INFJ partner in the immediate vicinity is already doing the job.
They may feel even if irrationally that they are not needed and that finding actualization is almost impossible with another INFJ around. The result of such an experience could be a very deep psycho-spiritual crisis, which is particularly likely if the INFJ has yet to individuate.
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The maturity and wisdom that comes from self-growth always positions individuals in a better place to relate to their friends and loved ones. Elaine INFJ has been studying personality theory since she was first introduced to the Myers-Briggs taxonomy over 20 years ago.
A true Jungian, she began writing about typology inshortly before beginning her collaboration with A.
She is currently authoring a book on the INFJ personality type. Read Elaine's bio here.
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Great post Elaine. You touched on some great points. No fun being an infj sometimes is it?